The mother tongue I mentioned here means the accent of the southwestern Shandong province tongue. Not the putonghua. Infact this accent also belongs to the Mandarin but quite different in tone and pronunciation from the putonghua.

But I never took this mother tongue as a glory and usually felt shame whenever I spook it in front of lots of putonghua-speaking guys.  I always think this tongue sounds just too rustic .

Apparently it is just my own prejudice because I have a fellow townman and she never felt uncomfortable when she chatting with her friends by phone in our mother tongue. Sometimes she tried to talk with me in the accent but I just used the putonghua and it is sure  not a polite way.

Why do I so shy?

Is this a sign of my lack of confidence? Why do I always care other people's eye?